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Anyone who has opened his or
her heart and home to a pet knows the anguish of saying
"Goodbye" when that pet passes on. Just because they are
animals does not make mourning their deaths any easier. The grief
process is a complex one, not easily understood by most people.
Because many people do not believe that mourning the death of a pet
is appropriate, the process becomes even more difficult for those
pet owners who think of their pets as members of the family.
Oftentimes, owners of deceased pets are unable to find support for
their grief when friends and even family members don’t understand
the close relationship the pet owner shared with their animal
companion. This lack of understanding can lead to embarrassment and
hurt feelings on the parts of both the grieving pet owner and those
the pet owner is trying to reach out to for strength in a very
difficult and emotional situation. Know to whom you can comfortably
turn to be consoled and supported while you grieve. Until one has
experienced the joy, bonding and companionship of having a pet
become a member of the family, it is difficult, if not impossible,
to truly understand the depth of feeling and the level of grief that
a pet's death can bring.
Pet owners are many times
faced with the choice of euthanizing their pet when suffering can no
longer be alleviated. Euthanasia offers a quick and relatively
painless option for pets that have very little quality of life due
to advanced age and/or terminal illness. I counsel clients at the
veterinary practice where I work that, when the pet is no longer
enjoying life and the owner is no longer enjoying caring for the
pet, it may be time to consider euthanasia. Add the weight of this
decision to the grief process, and you have a heartbreaking
experience that is so difficult to deal with emotionally it can take
pet owners months and even years to come to grips with their
feelings.
When possible, the pet owner
may find it useful to prepare for the death of a pet well in
advance. Knowing what is going to happen both during and after your
pet’s death will help eliminate the stress of making emotional
decisions under pressure that you might be unhappy with later on.
Understand the euthanasia process by contacting
your veterinarian about exactly what you can expect. You should be
afforded the choice of whether or not to stay by your pet’s side
while euthanasia is being performed. If you choose to be present,
have all the paperwork formalities completed well in advance, such
as the release form your veterinarian will require you to sign and
the payment. In this way you are free to leave immediately following
the appointment, eliminating confrontations with other curious
clients who may be in the reception area.
Know what options are
available to you for disposition of your pet’s body. Many
municipalities do not allow burial of pets within city limits. Your
veterinarian may provide these services or be able to give you
information regarding pet cemeteries, crematories or even funeral
homes that offer pet cremations.
The death of a loved one,
human or animal, is a traumatic experience and one from which you
never quite recover. Take solace in knowing you did all you could to
give your pet a good and productive life and a dignified, humane
death. As time goes on, the terrible hurt will be replaced by the
memories of wonderful years spent with a faithful companion and
friend.
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